Terrible April 2015

April really spiraled down for me and it happened so quickly that tears soaked my pillow case every other night. For a person that rarely cries, this really was a terrible month for me.....

1)      My grandma being sick: This probably is the biggest shock to me. She is someone that I love with all my heart and was there for me since the day I was born. My grandma brought me and my brother up, from bathing us, taking us to school, making our lunch, and teaching us the rights and wrongs in life. She is a very strong and independent woman that I really look up to. Now seeing her so weak and small makes me really scary about everything esp aging. =(

2)      Losing a friendship: For about a month and a half talking to J made me really happy. He was someone that I looked forward to talking to every night. Even though we were just friends, he made me feel really special. He was one of the very few people that I felt really cared about how I felt and what was going through my head. When we hung out he would suggest all these things that we should go next time…and every time he said that I would cringe a little because I always worried that next time wouldn’t come. In April, next time never came….

3)      Broken relationship: Seeing a couple that was ideal to me fall apart is very surreal. When everything is ok and all of a sudden it’s not is really scary. I make me lose faith in all relationships in general. I hope everything will be ok but this one is also one that is out of my control.

4)      Breaking out: Growing up, acne was never an issue. I was blessed with nice skin and water and moisturizer was my only skin care routine. When I was 23, I broke out with cystic acne, and that took about 2 years to fully clear. From then, I was really careful with what touched my face and makeup I used. For about 3 years, I kept my face under control and would get a pimple in a blue moon. Ever since April, I started breaking out again. I thought it was probably due to the time of the month. But as that ended the acne is still not going away… Now, this also adds to the things I stress about. =(

Little things that added to terrible April:

1)      Losing my one of my favorite earring, diamond stud that I rarely take off.

2)      Having my car keyed at a supermarket

3)      Parents getting into an accident (Thankful that no one was hurt)

4)      Hair cut too short

5)      Cousins moved out